Okay, boosted this from she who does bucky nekkid cartwheels in a hyperbaric chamber. Swear to goodness, that’s the best blog name out there, if for no other reason than I could never get away with it. I have a love for anything anything I find interesting that I couldn’t do.
Either way, it goes like this. I went to musicoutfitters.com and brought down the top 100 songs of my graduation year of high school (1997). Now, the ones I like–and there’s a pretty low threshhold for liking something–are in bold. Guilty pleasures are italicized. Songs I don’t like get that good strikeout. If I don’t care, it gets nothing.
And there’s a chance this list may stop at fiddy. 100’s a lotta songs.
Let’s go.
1. Candle In The Wind 1997, Elton John I have so many good things to say about Elton John, but our friendship has to be strong for me to listen to his songs in the car. No one wants to hear me sing “Rocketman.” Seuss digs it, too, so we can sing along to it together without feeling uncomfortable. It makes me feel good about things.
2. Foolish Games / You Were Meant For Me, Jewel
3. I’ll Be Missing You, Puff Daddy and Faith Evans I don’t care who this was about. It was absolutely terrible. There are songs about Jesus that suck.
4. Un-Break My Heart, Toni Braxton
5. Can’t Nobody Hold Me Down, Puff Daddy
6. I Believe I Can Fly, R. Kelly. If my godson could write it, no dice. My godson is seven months old.
7. Don’t Let Go (Love), En Vogue
8. Return Of The Mack, Mark Morrison White people, I just don’t understand you all sometimes.
9. How Do I Live, LeAnn Rimes
10. Wannabe, Spice Girls The only time I’ve ever wanted to box with Nelson Mandela was when he acknowledged loving them. Must not have been any good musicians when he waws on the bricks.
11. Quit Playing Games (With My Heart), Backstreet Boys
12. MMMBop, Hanson
13. For You I Will, Monica
14. You Make Me Wanna…, Usher
15. Bitch, Meredith Brooks Why are empowering and corny so often synonymous?
16. Nobody Keith Sweat Open your mouth, Keith. I can’t understand what you’re saying. And were’s Kut Close right now?
17. Semi-Charmed Life, Third Eye Blind
18. Barely Breathing, Duncan Sheik
19. Hard To Say I’m Sorry, Az Yet Featuring Peter Cetera I admit to liking some really bad records with Peter Cetera on them.
20. Mo Money Mo Problems, Notorious B.I.G. My goodness.
21. The Freshmen, Verve Pipe
22. I Want You, Savage Garden
23. No Diggity, BLACKstreet Featuring Dr. Dre If for no other reason than I bet Bill Withers need to cash a check.
24. I Belong To You (Every Time I See Your Face), Rome Simpin’ must be easy.
25. Hypnotize, Notorious B.I.G.
26. Every Time I Close My Eyes, Babyface Who told him he could write songs? And who told you to like those songs?
27. In My Bed, Dru Hill
28. Say You’ll Be There, Spice Girls Just playing. This is abysmal.
29. Do You Know (What It Takes), Robyn
30. 4 Seasons Of Loneliness, Boyz II Men Hello, we’re negroes, but no need to feel threatened.
31. G.H.E.T.T.O.U.T., Changing Faces On part two of this song, they threaten to make buddy “disappear.” I’m dead serious.
32. Honey, Mariah Carey
33. I Believe In You And Me, Whitney Houston One day, someone will have to explain to me why black people love Whitney Houston so much.
34. Da’ Dip, Freaknasty
35. 2 Become 1, Spice Girls
36. All For You, Sister Hazel
37. Cupid, 112 So poorly written. However, that is the one lowlight on a great record.
38. Where Have All The Cowboys Gone?, Paula Cole
39. Sunny Came Home, Shawn Colvin
40. It’s Your Love, Tim McGraw and Faith Hill
41. Ooh Aah… Just A Little Bit, Gina G Don’t know the song, but it sounds dreadful.
42. Mouth, Merril Bainbridge
43. All Cried Out, Allure Featuring 112 Better than the original?
44. I’m Still In Love With You, New Edition Rare bright spot on a bad record.
45. Invisible Man, 98 Degrees
46. Not Tonight, Lil’ Kim Assuming we’re talking about the “Ladies’ Night” remix.
47. Look Into My Eyes, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
48. Get It Together, 702
49. All By Myself, Celine Dion
50. It’s All Coming Back To Me Now, Celine Dion
51. My Love Is The Shhh!, Somethin’ For The People I was like sixteen. I still wouldn’t pay to see these suckers piss on a flat rock.
52. Where Do You Go, No Mercy
53. I Finally Found Someon, Barbra Streisand and Bryan Adams
54. I’ll Be, Foxy Brown Featuring Jay-Z Never liked it. Not for a second.
55. If It Makes You Happy , Sheryl Crow
56. Never Make A Promise, Dru Hill
57. When You Love A Woman, Journey
58. Up Jumps Da Boogie, Magoo And Timbaland What a beat. And what y’all know about the CAU Residence Hall Step Show ’97?
59. I Don’t Want To / I Love Me Some Him, Toni Braxton
60. Everyday Is A Winding Road, Sheryl Crow
61. Cold Rock A Party, Mc Lyte I remember liking this, but I can’t remember what it sounds like.
62. Pony, Ginuwine Shady Ln’s father–R.I.P.–loved this song. So funny.
63. Building A Mystery, Sarah McLachlan
64. I Love You Always Forever, Donna Lewis
65. Your Woman, White Town
66. C U When U Get There, Coolio
67. Change The World, Eric Clapton A lot of songs from men that don’t sound, yanno, manly.
68. My Baby Daddy, B-Rock and The Bizz One of the few things that I believe may have set the race back.
69. Tubthumping, Chumbawamba
70. Gotham City, R. Kelly Kareem from Kansas City, Brawly ’97, did a great interpolation of this.
71. Last Night, Az Yet If for no other reason than the leader of this group was the nigga that gave up on Boyz II Men because he thought they weren’t going anywhere.
72. ESPN Presents The Jock Jam, Various Artists
73. Big Daddy, Heavy D
74. What About Us, Total I remember liking this. Wow, my memory’s going bad.
75. Smile, Scarface Oh my goodness, flawless from top to bottom.
76. What’s On Tonight, Montell Jordan
77. Secret Garden, Bruce Springsteen
78. The One I Gave My Heart, w Aaliyah
79. Fly Like An Eagle, Seal
80. No Time, Lil’ Kim Great choice of sample. JB’s “Take Me As I Am.”
81. Naked Eye, Luscious Jackson
82. Macarena (Bayside Boys Mix), Los Del Rio Could a Latino please tell me if you guys talk about whether your race was set back by shit like this?
83. On and On, Erykah Badu Overrated though it may be.
84. Don’t Wanna Be A Player, Joe Punk ass.
85. I Shot The Sheriff, Warren G
86. You Should Be Mine (Don’t Waste Your Time), Brian McKnight Featuring Mase
87. Don’t Cry For Me Argentina, Madonna
88. Someone, SWV
89. Go The Distance, Michael Bolton
90. One More Time, Real McCoy
91. Butta Love, Next
92. Coco Jamboo, Mr. President
93. Twisted, Keith Sweat
94. Barbie Girl, Aqua
95. When You’re Gone / Free To Decide, Cranberries
96. Let Me Clear My Throat, DJ Kool Probably gonna hear this ’til the day I die. Good? I dunno.
97. I Like It, Blackout Allstars
98. You’re Makin’ Me High / Let It Flow, Toni Braxton
99. You Must Love Me, Madonna
100. Let It Go, Ray J
September 22, 2005
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