Once again, Alan Keyes is running for President. This will be the third time he gets his ass handed to him.
That’s a bit unfair for me to say. I don’t believe for a minute that Keyes has believed that he would win any of his previous runs for the White House, nor do I think he figured he could really derail the building Barack Obama Express. Getting on him for losing those races is kind of like picking on someone because he got beat up by 15 people at the same time.
But if you decide to mess with them 15 dudes, just asking them to stomp you, then there are a few chuckles to be had. Nothing makes me laugh as hard as watching someone walk into an ass whoopin’.
I mean, I just don’t get it. Keyes is ridiculously intelligent, but he’s a joke to most on each side of the political spectrum. He gets overly bombastic about the wrong things (refer to his singing of Negro spirituals on TV during his race with Obama), and he’s a little too smart. He’s good to talk over your dome. People don’t like that. At all.
So now, we’re gonna have to listen to that dude at some point. I mean, we don’t have to, but it’ll probably come up.
But unlike in the race with Obama, no one in the media will care to listen to him. He’ll be as fringe as fringe can be.
I just wanna know what dude’s accomplishing with this. And who are the people that contribute to his campaign fund. Why don’t they just give that money to me? Or put it in a stack by the leaves in an outhouse? I just don’t understand.
9 Comments
by Jay
You forgot to mention the dude’s nucking futs. Seriously, I’ve met the dude and I think he’s crazier that a sh!thouse rat. He is a smart m.f., so maybe he teeters on the genius/lunatic fence.
I have no idea who’s bankrolling him. They probably have a few screws loose as well.
by ETS
Hill Harper once said that no one is more aspirational than the black man. I think he had Keyes in mind.
by Kirk
You don’t have to win to affect the outcome. Jesse Jackson never had a shot in hell either, but he still tried. Not much different.
by Aden
at the risk of giving this member of the
Southern American Minority Brotherhood Organization a few more hits on his site i must show y’all the type of crap they spew and advertise on it…
http://www.renewamerica.us/
enjoy
by Jarrett
As you mentioned, being good for a laugh can be healthy for a presidential race.
Particularly since some want more folks to take Obama seriously.
by eauhellzgnaw
His candidacy in the IL Senate race was some old “let’s hand the sinking ship to the negro” shit. Whoever faced Obama after the Ryan scandal was going to lose big time. Instead of tainting the local Republican candidates, they decided to get an outsider to take the L (“and, hey, what do you know–he’s black? We didn’t even notice. Republicans don’t see color”).
There’s something to be gained from supporting Keyes, I suppose. The fact that he is unelectable means that he can cater to his right wing extremist base, and the fact that he is black makes them think that they can defend themselves against claims of racism.
But yeah, smart guy–probably the smartest conservative political token out there, but definitely bats in the belfry.
by Left Coast Vic
Ha!
That Renew America website is probably the most ridiculous shit I’ve ever seen. You peep the books they sell? One of the books is called “Annexing Mexico” … nuff said.
These cats need to get tasered like homeboy at that John Kerry rally.
by Tiffany
The answer to your question (re why folks would contribute to Keyes’ campaign) –Some people go to the movies for fun…others get their kicks from giving money to the brilliant (but crazy) Alan Keyes. Apparently the net benefit to Alan is pretty high from his political campaigns. Word has is that he has paid himself pretty handsomely out of his campaign coffers. Also, his speaking fees have doubled after his (failed) runs for president. (Not that he’s the only one to capitalize off of this phenomenon, I’m sure.)
by Aden
the books on that site look like parodies
or titles cut from one of my favorite chappelle skits (various types of chanks! cunnilingus rice!)
keyes is definitely the chairman of the Coalition Of Organized Negroes