The Dumbest Thing I've Ever Heard

June 6, 2006

Business…today, I’ve got a piece on coming to peace with the late Eric Gregg. No hard feelings.
(And no, the piece isn’t the dumbest thing ever. At least not to me.)
Moving on, I must admit I feel kind of bad about this post. I really don’t think it’s fair to laugh at people for shortcomings beyond their control. So instead of laughing at this story’s protagonist, chastise the system that contributed to him. After you laugh, of course.
So my man Bobo sends me a text yesterday.
“Somebody asked me dead serious what part of Texas Puerto Rico was in.”
Now there was no way this was a true story, so I had to call him and find out the story.
It seems that he was telling a friend of his that he was going to Puerto Rico for a few days. The dude said something positive about him taking this trip…to Texas.
So he said, again, that he was going to Puerto Rico.
“That’s on the other side of Texas, right? What part of Texas is that in?”
So my buddy’s nice enough and deft enough that he was able to provide the dude with an out that wouldn’t embarrass him. He told him that he was talking about the Puerto Rico in the Caribbean.
“That’s over there by Africa, right?”
Public schools. They’re failing. Bad.
But real talk–most people I know are dreadful with geography. Not that bad, but pretty damn bad. We gotta work on that for real. As Big Walt would say, we gotta do it for the bebbies.

Comments


PWordsmith

September 19, 3044, 11:59 pm

great piece... I was a Pirate fan right up until Sid Bream slid Barry Bonds right out of Pittsburgh in 1992. I proceeded to root against the Braves from that point forward, even as one of their players, David Justice was, next to Bonds and Griffey, one of my favorites. One of the most difficult things about being passionate about sports is how biased it makes you and potentially inhumane you can be. You did a great job in bringing that out.

Left Coast Vic

September 19, 3045, 11:59 pm

I got another story about folks not knowing geography. A few years back, me and the homie convinced the other homie that there were 52 states. So he asked us which were the new states. We were spittin this all on the fly, so I told him that in the last presidential they voted to admit Guam and Puerto Rico into the union. His response, "Oh, word?"

eauhellzgnaw

September 19, 3046, 11:59 pm

As a senior in high school, I remember taking a test on the Reformation in my English class (don't ask me why we were tested on this in English). One answer was so ridiculous, the teacher decided to read it out loud to everyone. A girl had written on Martin Luther and I remember the final sentence going something like: "after he was finished reforming the church, he turned his attention to achieving his dream of freeing African-Americans from racism and discrimination." The thing is, she was dead serious (and no, I wasn't in the slow-motion class).

Kirk

September 19, 3047, 11:59 pm

Martin Luther...he's the guy that nailed those papers to the National mall during the Million Man March, right? That's almost as funny as Puerto Rico, TX. And those people still holding Eric Gregg grudges need to get help. Not like the Braves didn't blow a million other chances anyway.

jaedalaurez

September 19, 3048, 11:59 pm

Another story about issues with geography... My ex wanted to take me to dinner, and I told him I couldn't because I was dropping my father off at the airport and we'd be doing dinner instead. So he asks me, "Where's he going?" I say, "Barcelona." He says, "What's that?" Folks. Feel free to read that again- not "Where's that?"...."WHAT'S that?" I started laughing, cause I thought he was joking....and then realized he was looking at me like, "What's funny?" 36 years old, college educated (supposedly-at SU)....and didn't know "what" Barcelona is, like, seriously was not aware if it was a country or a city. A pro BASKETBALL SCOUT didn't know where the F****g Dream Team played. You know I couldn't stay with him, right?

Stephanie

September 19, 3049, 11:59 pm

A friend was going to Spain on a study abroad program. Her aunt, a public school elementary teacher in Lynchburg, VA, asked in all seriousness, "What language do they speak there?"

Rhonda Carter

September 19, 3050, 11:59 pm

When I was little, I thought PR was located off of the east coast, somewhere close to New York. One guess why I made such an assumption. Honestly though, it could be a case of the kind of "blind spot" we all have in one area of our lives or another...some thoroughly wrong fact we learned that somehow never managed to be purged or corrected. It happens.